Next Season’s Awkward Style Guide

In the past few weeks the snowsports world has seen a whole host of trade show events with weird abbreviations like ISPO, SIA, and NUSHIT.

These events are where all the industry folk meet to show off their new gear and sort out orders with shops. All the stuff on display this month will be available in your favourite rider owned shops at the start of the 2014/15 season and in TXMaxx at the start of the 2015/16 season.

Our invite got lost in the post, but fortunately Whitelines went down to ISPO to check out next seasons gear and we thought we’d share some of their highlights. It all looks really nice but it’s clear that looking awkward will be the ‘in thing’ next season.

We clicked through a thousand multiple page click through gear guides to bring you the best photos of people looking awkward at trade shows. Check out our style guide for looking super awkward next season.

The I haven’t had much sleep and I’m not enjoying this trade show look.

The I’m not puffing out my chest to look bigger (honest).

The I’m not angry, just disappointed.

As brought to you by our good friend Joe Cav!

The fucking hell don’t you look weird whilst wearing goggles and a facemask off the hill?

The it would be too easy to make a reference to what you’re thinking.

The oh fuck did I just spill my spaghetti down me? 

Look, it’s Joe Cav again! Not only is he Shaun White’s number one fan but he’s also the king of the awkward style!

The gurning whilst holding clothes that are too small for me awkward look.

The look at it like you’re in love with it.

We told you Joe Cav was the king of awkward.

The well this is a stupid idea.

Seriously, a back pack with a hood? Surely this is one of the most shit snowboard accessories?

The what the fuck are you wearing.

Ok, I know it’s Mervin who are all cool and kooky and all that but I think Nathan Barley had a quote that’s relevant here: ‘Idiots think it’s cool. Cool people think it’s a joke.’

The thumbs up for boobs (or how not to look like a tool at a trade show)

We contacted Joe Cav and he had this to say about why the awkward look is so hot at trade shows:

“It’s really awkward because we’re not Chris Kightley which is why we’re working at ISPO not swanning around looking pretty. You don’t want to look at the camera, because that makes you look like a cunt and we all know blue steel is pretty much the same thing as looking right. You also have heaps of people looking at you thinking ‘why is that cunt having a picture taken of him and an Airblaster hoodie? He looks like a right cunt’. All in all, going to a trade show is 90% looking like a cunt and 10% finding the quiet toilet to have a nap in because you spent too long at SEXYLAND the night before”.

Arduous viewing of multiple page click through gear guides and Words by Romberto Curluso; style guide guru at The Seasonaire.

Images by Whitelines. Check out their gear section for more lovely photos of lovely stuff.

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